Tuesday, July 26, 2005

t.g.i.f


I walked in at around 10, and the place was packed. I walked around looking for my companions, got no more than a few metres and gave up. A mass of moving bodies in a claustrohobic space and I realized there's no way i am going to find them. There was no walking room, people were just standing in the middle holding a glass in their hands. I went over to the entrance and called my companions. One of them walked over and and told me to follow him. It was like the guide leading the blind as he gave a walking commentary "here, this way" , "no, this way, there's a real looker right ahead", "OMG did you see that rack??!"

We stood behind the stage, against the wall. The band members were nowhere in sight, and after a drink or two i felt bored. It was getting uncomfortably hot too. Standing beside us were two precious looking ladies, one that looked in her early twenties and the other, a more mature executive look. They were having a animated conversation punctured regularly with laughter, and after a few drinks they began to dance. I thought they put on quite a show in the absence of the band. Arms around each other, gyrating against each other to the pulsing beat of the music...just too bad there's no "upstairs room" for them to go makeout. A round of drinks later they left.

Someone's friend dropped by with a glass in one hand and a babe's waist in the other. He gave me a condescending look which flashes by quickly, but hell yeah i know that look when i see it. (Do i have the word N.E.R.D tattooed on my forehead or something?) He is a salesman representing some biomed company, and he knows just what kind of pills i need.
"Hey, you look quite pale"
"....So i am"
"Are you interested in getting tanned?"
"you selling sunbeds or something"
"No, something better. Pills that will give your skin a healthy tanned look!"
(wtf...) "Ok, you tried them before?"
"No, i go to the pool. Hey, you really should drop by my clinic sometime. I can explain to you in details."
(i don't feel lucky enough to swallow pigment pills, but out of courtesy...) "umm...sure. i will think about it."

Mercifully, the band came on and ended the conversation. There were 2 leads and they took turns to perform. I thought the gal has a much better voice than the guy, there were definitely some low points when the guy is singing. The gal got the crowd going with a rousing performance of Creep.
You're so FUCKIN special (Quite a few people shouted this line out lol)
I wished I was special.
But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doing here?
When I don't belong here.


This song is just awesome and reflected my sentiments exactly. I went into contemplation mood and felt the blues coming. Or it could be i was feeling light-headed and the smoke around the place is killing my eyes. I downed a glass of ice water and excused myself for the night. I walked out into the night. It was a cold night and in the absence of clouds the sky was dotted with stars. I sat down on the stairs. My body reeks like an old ashtray, my head was throbbing, I can barely open my eyes as they are so dry.

I really should stop doing this already.

Wednesday, July 20, 2005

how are you feeling today?



exhausted, lonely, hopeful

spot the fake smile

i have often been accused of forcing a grimacing smile...maybe that's why i can spot a fake smile a mile away. I got 16/20 score for this test.
link

Tuesday, July 19, 2005

夜深了

在纷乱的社会里,种种因素造成压力无形的产生而感到烦躁.在深夜里,跟网友在网上清谈,给予慰问。虽然素未谋面,谈起来有时候反比真实的朋友来得亲切.在 言语间意会到自己的不安,虽不能完全放下,但也能给一个短暂的舒缓.虽然他们看不到,其实朋友也好网友也好,在此真心地想答谢你们.

Friday, July 8, 2005

说话的温度

(转贴)说话的温度----郑丹瑞

急事,慢慢的说;
大事,清楚的说;
小事,幽默的说;
没把握的事,谨慎的说;
没发生的事,不要胡说;
做不到的事,别乱说;
伤害人的事,不能说;
讨厌的事,对事不对人的说;
开心的事,看场合说;
伤心的事,不要见人就说;
别人的事,小心的说;
自己的事,听听自己的心怎么说;
现在的事,做了再说;
未来的事,未来再说;
如果对我有不满意的地方,请一定要对我说。

Thursday, July 7, 2005

无壳蜗牛

好友打电话向我诉苦说心情很不好。我挂念着,提议马上去会面。

"你很闷会影响我心情,我约了别人,你不用来。“

这番患难见真情的话,带给我一定的震撼力。想起来近期较少见面,可能出于同样的原因。

需要一个人时,处于被动的状况,不时期望着被关怀。想见面,被需要的对方却可潇洒的说
“今天不行,明天也不行,你别这样,你应该有你自己的生活。”
近期沉溺地需要别人,现在觉得自己得学习独立解决问题。

朋友有困难,好在朋友周围有其他人能给予开导规劝,我能比较放心。自己帮不了忙还给予负面的影响,我感到惭愧,有烦恼就不愿与不敢向对方诉说。


我这样是算多心,小气,无聊,自怜,还是像一只过敏的无壳蜗牛?以上均是吧。

Friday, July 1, 2005

war of the worlds

I just watched War of the Worlds. The night before I saw Signs and comparing these 2 alien themed movies, i prefer the latter. War of the Worlds has some hopping robots and niffy lasers in term of effects, beyond that nothing much. Signs has no special effects to talk about, but it is very effective in terms of suspense and made me jupmed a few times. Both movies featured disenchanted male lead, annoying daughter and the token disaffected young male.
War has a high body count, but i just can't feel anything for the characters.
Probably because of the mood i was in during the movie. I didn't plan on watching the movie, partly because i was turned off by Cruise's recent antics. A spur of the moment decision really, 5 mins before i left office. A lousy day at work, tasks piling high. I felt like i was being buried alive, the atmosphere was suffocating, my head was like a leaden weight. I needed to give myself a break and pamper myself a little so dragged my ass to the theatres and pick a show.
The ending is a bit of a letdown, just like Signs's was. The show was not that great but it was a tune-out session for me and i do feel a little better. And oh yes, the trailer for Peter Jackson's King Kong was played before the movie. One word, bizarre.